Celeb excuses.

We went to visit my dad last night because my mom went on a trip with her best friend, leaving my dad to fend for himself. When she told me she was going on vacation, I asked her who was going to feed Daddy and who was going to wake him up to go to bed when he fell asleep in his recliner at 9pm every night. She said “Taco Bell” and “I guess he’ll sleep in the living room.”

We ate steaks, watched The Good Guys, and ate ice cream but I did manage to squeeze in People Magazine from Sept 13. I’m only 3 weeks behind. One of my favorite reads was celebrity excuses for wrongdoings. They showcase Paris Hilton’s latest arrest and then recalled others in the past: See below.

Paris Hilton – Arrested for .8 oz of cocaine in her purse. She said she thought it was “a stick of gum” and also said the bag wasn’t hers. MmmKay.

Nicole Richie – (2006) Arrested for driving under the influence of pot and Vicodin. Said she has really bad menstrual cramps. I’m with her on this one. Who doesn’t raid their Grandmother’s pain med cabinet at least once a month? 😉

Ashlee Simpson – (2004) The lip-synching debacle on SNL. She said the band “starting playing the wrong song”, which totally clears up why a recording of her singing came on. How can we ever take you seriously as a recording artist now, Ashlee?

Tatum O’Neal – (2008) Bought cocaine from a drug dealer. Explained she was researching a role as a junkie and asked the cops “Can’t we just forget about this?” No, Tatum, we just can’t, since it’s illegal and all.

Winona Ryder -(2001) Remember her stealing all that crap from Saks? Well, it was because her director told her to shoplift for a role she was preparing for. Maybe her and O’Neal have the same director. What was the movie, Winona? How To Flush Your “Career” Down The Toilet. Didn’t see it…

Lindsay Lohan (2010) There are really too many excuses to tell about in only one blog posting…but she did miss a VERY important court date because she was in France and “someone stole her passport.” You mean to tell me that a rich, Hollywood celebrity can’t pay her way back to America? Oh, what’s that, judge? It could have been easily replaced? Sorry, Lindsay. Go directly to jail. Do not collect $100 dollars.

I also want to check out this guy that makes stick sculptures. He has a book called Stickwork. Pretty cool stuff. I bet the Three Little Pig’s house would have held up to the Big Bad Wolf had Patrick Dougherty built their house. 

 

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