Today I picked Self-Care. I threw away outdated medicine, “picked out a new toothbrush” (because the dentist gave me one), got my teeth cleaned which included a “blood pressure check”, and I started taking my vitamins again. I get on a kick where I take them every day for a couple weeks, then just quit.
So then dentist was a hoot, as usual. He’s this old guy who thinks he is hilarious. He tells the same corney jokes every 6-12 months. Usually, the hygenist cleans my teeth and he just comes in to prod around and tell me to floss. But she was sick, so he cleaned them himself, which translate into more time for those jokes.
Here are the highlights of our conversation:
“You’ve got a little tarter here on these front teeth. Do you eat a lot of fish?”
“Yes, Doc, I actually ate fish for lunch today.”
“Well, that’s where tartar comes from.”
“Yup, from the tarter sauce.”
Insert my fake laughter, and the assistant’s cause you know if I have heard this joke 4 times in 4 years, she has heard it 4 times today.
“Weird, I didn’t eat tarter sauce today.”
“What kind of fish did you eat?”
“Did you know catfish have fleas?”
“Nope, sure didn’t.”
“It’s cause they won’t wear their flea collars.”
Hardee har har.
And here I was actually thinking that there is a correlation between fish and tartar. But I was onto him by the time he got to the flea collars.